My Secrets Discovered Read online

  I looked down and swirled my tea with the plastic stirrer Blondie had left in the mug. “I was here before ten,” I admitted. “I waited in the car until you opened the store.”

  “Forgive me for being blunt, but you don’t look or act like our regular customer. I’ve been around long enough, though, to know that folks aren’t always what they seem to be. So, why are you here, and what the heck was all that crying about?”

  I sighed. Blondie sat there, looking at me expectantly, and I could see she was going to wait for me to make the next move. I took a bite of a cookie. It was dry and hard, and took several sips of tea to get it down.

  “The tea is delicious,” I said. “I might want a second a cup.”

  Blondie nodded and waited for me to continue.

  I took a deep breath and plunged in. “You’ll probably think I’m some bored housewife, and maybe I am, but something happened to me yesterday, and it’s changed me forever.” I explained my unexpected trip into the store the day before, and how the mind-blowing orgasm I had with a vibrator made me realize that something was missing from life—something that couldn’t be filled with masturbation alone.

  “I want to have wild, wonderful sex, and I want my husband to feel the same way. We are twenty years deep into a monogamous relationship, and we don’t even see each other any more.” I felt my eyes watering and dabbed away the tears with a napkin, wondering if my earlier outburst had left a trail of mascara down my face.

  “I came here thinking some new clothes and underwear might help to get him to notice me again. When you asked if you could help me find what I was looking for, I became overwhelmed with the thought of what that might be.”

  I looked at Blondie expectantly, hoping she’d have some words of wisdom, or at least be understanding.

  Blondie nodded her head. “Want more tea?”

  I was surprised to find my hands clenched around an empty mug. I didn’t remember draining the contents. “Yes, please.”

  She refilled our cups and sat back down with her hands spread out on the table. “So you want wild, wonderful sex, and you want your husband to feel the same way?”

  I nodded, sipping the tea. I felt oddly relaxed, considering I’d just spent a half hour pouring out the intimate details of my life to a complete stranger.

  “And I’m guessing you want the sex to be with him, and that he’ll want to it have with you?”

  My stomach sank. It never occurred to me that Mark might be unresponsive because there was someone else. “Oh, my God, Blondie. Do you think he’s having an affair?”

  “Honey, I have no idea. But I’ll tell you what. I can help you outfit yourself with some new clothes and a new attitude. If you still get no response, then he’s either gay, dead, or bonking someone else.”

  I downed the rest of my tea in a few long gulps and set the mug down on the table with a thump. I knew when I came here that I was on some sort of mission. Now I knew what it was. I would save my marriage from sexual mediocrity!

  “All rightie, then,” I said. “Let’s get started, Blondie.”

  “Good girl! Hey, what’s your name?”

  “Jen Hauser.”

  Blondie put our mugs in the small kitchenette sink and placed the bag of cookies back on the shelf. “Come on, Jen. Let’s have some fun.”

  I followed her around the store as she held up various styles and colors of panties, bras, negligées, baby dolls, corsets, thongs, bodysuits, and some articles of clothing I couldn’t identify by name. I nodded yes or no. When she had an armload of items, she led me to a fitting room.

  “Get started with these. I’ll see what else I can find.”

  Like everything else so far about Secrets, the dressing room décor was a first for me. I hadn’t been in one so luxurious since I went shopping for my wedding gown. The room was the size of a small bedroom. To my right was a red velvet loveseat with glass top tables on either end.

  On the wall straight ahead, directly opposite the curtained entrance, were wall hooks and racks to hang the items. Across from the loveseat, on the wall to my left, a three-way mirror with a carpeted platform in front furnished views of every angle. An entertainment unit nestled into the far left corner held a television and sound system.

  I put my purse down on the end table at the far end of the sofa and started to undress. Blondie called to me from outside the curtain.

  “Jen, I have something else for you. Can I come in?”

  “Sure,” I said, and started to separate the items in the order I wanted to try them on.

  My back was to the dressing room opening, but I heard Blondie put something down on the table at the other end of the sofa. By the time I turned around, she was gone. She’d left a tray with sliced cheese, crackers, and a bunch of grapes. There was also a tall glass with what looked like iced tea.

  “Thanks,” I called out.

  “You’re welcome. Let me know if you need anything in a different size or if you need help fastening something.”

  I grabbed a couple of chunks of cheese and some grapes before downing a swig of the iced tea. It was the same tea we’d been drinking before, but stronger. I felt lightheaded and slightly giddy as I tried on the first see-through nightie. It looked ridiculous over my bland bra and panties, so I changed into one of the lingerie sets Blondie had picked out and put the nightie back on.

  Now we’re getting somewhere!

  The sight of myself in the mirror excited me. I’d put on a few pounds over the years, but the added inches were in all the right places. I had what you’d call an “hourglass figure.” I stepped up on the platform in front of the three-way mirror and checked the rear view. My thighs definitely looked better from the front, but my butt was nice and round. The fullness was in proportion to the rest of me. I put my hands on my waist and focused on the frontal view, the one I’d show Mark first.

  The black demi-cup bra trimmed in red lace pushed my ample breasts back up where they used to stand by themselves pre-baby. The matching black thong had the same red lace trim along the elastic that stretched snugly across the curve of my hips. Both items had slits for easy access to my hot spots. The short sheer baby doll nightie had tiny black lace shoulder straps woven with narrow red ribbon. The entire thing would probably slip off in an instant.

  I lowered my shoulder, and sure enough, the nightie fell to the floor. The feel of the smooth material against my skin stimulated my nipples, and they perked up pink and hard through the openings in the bra. I giggled, and tweaked them. A surge of heat traveled through my body, and I felt a bit unsteady, so I sat down on the sofa. I decided that it was probably hunger that was making me feel woozy and grabbed a couple of crackers off the tray.

  The food steadied my queasiness, and I decided to try on the corset, thong, and garter belt combo. I was midway through changing when Blondie came back in.

  “How’s it going? Need any help?”

  “Um, yes,” I said, holding up the garter belt. “Should I have some stockings to attach to these?”

  “I’ll get you some. Before I do that, though, let me help set the proper mood in here.” She stepped over the entertainment center to flip a few switches and turn a few dials. A scantily clad couple popped up on the flat screen television, and I realized it was a porn movie in progress. “I’ll be right back,” Blondie said, and disappeared beyond the curtain.

  I was mesmerized by the couple on the screen. It took only a few minutes of watching them for me to realize how limited my sexual experience truly was. I thought the erotica I was reading was the work of some good imaginations, but clearly people really did do these things—and to each other. Although I was initially engaged with watching from an informational standpoint, I found myself getting highly aroused as I watched the woman drop to her knees to caress the penis of her lover with her hands, tongue, and lips.

  The camera came in close, and I could see this couple was engaged in the real thing. I felt my own juices start to flow, and I realized I was standing the
re with no bottom on while I waited for Blondie to return with stockings. I sat down on the couch and began to stroke between my legs as I watched the man ejaculate in her mouth. The look on her face said she was receiving the best gift ever.

  Within seconds of the two of them expressing their rapture, he lifted her onto the bed, and she fell back, legs wide open, bent at the knees. He spread her further apart with one hand, and the camera zoomed in close. He set his mouth down on her, and I watched as he worked her clit with his finger while licking and sucking her. Although the movie audio was turned off, I could imagine her screams of pleasure as she writhed up and down.

  I was so engrossed in the visual, I barely realized I had my thumb circling my engorged clit with three fingers inside myself, moving in time with the couple. I stopped abruptly. Blondie was standing inside the curtain holding a package of hosiery in one hand and a long box in the other. I was horrified to be discovered mid-masturbation in her store, but Blondie smiled at me with the look of open friendship.

  “Good, I see you’re relaxing.” She nodded with understanding. “Here, try these when you’re through.” She tossed the hosiery packet beside me on the sofa and placed the box on the table next to the tray of food. “The vibrator you bought yesterday may have felt a bit cold and inflexible for your comfort. Here’s a better model that feels more like the real thing. I know you’re gonna want it, so I’ve preloaded it with the batteries. Give it a try before you leave.” With a wink, she disappeared once more through the curtain.

  I reached over for the box. The product was called The Rabbit, and it was a pink, translucent penis-shaped vibrator with a weird extension angling out from the base. I turned the box over and was delighted to find an illustrated sequence that demonstrated how to position the device for the most pleasure.

  While I figured out how to use my new toy, I felt a hot flush come over me, and I downed the rest of the iced tea. Glancing back at the couple on the screen, I could see they were now engaged in full out fucking with her on top, riding him like a bucking bronco. Oh, that looked good, and I wanted it, too. I ripped open the box. One more glance at the illustration, and I knew that the weird extension was a clitoris massager.

  My attention went back to the screen, and I watched how she moved up and down on his shaft. I’ve never been on top when Mark and I did it, but she sure made it look like it was worth a try.

  I kneeled on the sofa and put Mr. Rabbit directly under me. I lowered myself down on it, rotated the device so that the extension cradled my clit, and flipped the switch. I watched the shaft disappear within me, and I contracted my muscles around it. Waves of pleasure rippled through me, and I marveled at how quickly I was brought to orgasm.

  It didn’t stop at one little shudder. No, it was a series of explosions from my deepest core. I lost all sense of where I was and rode Mr. Rabbit again and again. When my thighs and knees felt weak with exhaustion from propping me up, I flipped over on my back, knees spread apart, and fucked myself silly with my Rabbit. The contractions didn’t stop, and neither did I.

  My hand was numb from grasping the buzzing vibrator, and that’s the only reason I shut it off. As I pulled Mr. Rabbit from my private chamber, I realized it was the clit massager that kept the desire going. Yesterday’s toy was a joke compared to this baby.

  Yeah, I’ll be taking this model, and let me know what other colors it comes in. I wanted to make sure if one malfunctioned, I wouldn’t be left without a backup.

  I remained on the sofa for several minutes, running my fingers over the folds of my moist pussy. I dared not touch my clit because I knew that would start me going crazy with Mr. Rabbit all over again, and I couldn’t stay in there forever. Glancing over at the television, I saw a black screen. I guess Mr. and Mrs. Horny were done, too.

  I got up and put on my clothes. I grabbed the nightie, corset, garter, stockings, and bra and thong set. I put Mr. Rabbit back in his box to take with me. Then I got a queasy feeling. What if Blondie had come in here while I was in my frenzy?

  I peeked out through the curtains. Blondie was on a ladder, setting up a display on the wall opposite the cash register. She looked over when she heard me pull the curtains aside.

  “All set?”

  I nodded and marched over to the counter to put the bundle down. Blondie joined me at the register.

  “I came in before to see how you were doing, but you were so busy, you didn’t see me, and I didn’t want to disturb you.”

  I’m sure I turned bright red, but Blondie appeared not to notice or chose to ignore it. She continued as if what she saw me do was a commonplace occurrence.

  “So, what else will you do to make sure your Saturday night date is one to remember?” she asked.

  “I know it’s going to take more than some sexy undies. I’m planning a complete makeover at my salon—haircut and color, manicure, and a pedicure.”

  “Uh huh. Are you going to the same place you usually go to?”

  “Oh, yes. I’ve been going to Carmen & Tito’s for years.”

  “Can I make a suggestion?” Blondie didn’t wait for my approval. “Keep going to the same place, and you’ll keep getting the same thing. Know what I mean?”

  She had a point. I ran a hand through my hair. “Do you have any suggestions?”

  “Here is the name and number of where I go. Tell them I sent you, and that you want the works. They’ll fit you in, even on a Saturday, if you mention my name.”

  “Great, thanks, Blondie. You’ve been so nice. I wish there was something I could do for you.”

  “Well, honey, there is.”

  “Name it. It’s yours.”

  “First you get yourself dolled up, and have the night of your life on Saturday. Then, if all works out like I know it will, plan a party for all your girlfriends. Tell them about what you did, and ask them if they’d like to spice up their lives, too. You fill your house with about five or six women, and I’ll bring the party favors, if you know what I mean.” Blondie looked at me knowingly with a big wink.

  “A party. For my friends.” I mulled it over. “Yeah, I like it. A fuckerware party.”

  Blondie roared with laughter. “Fuckerware,” she screeched. “I love it!”

  “All right, then. I’ll check in with you early next week. I’d better get going now. Can you ring me up?”

  “Sure thing. I have one more item to add, though.”

  “Really?” I was excited to see what else Blondie had up her sleeve.

  “It’s a gift.” She reached under the counter and pulled out a small tin. “You know that tea you’ve been drinkin’? It’s an aphrodisiac blend I make special myself. You can make tea or grind it into powder. Stir it into almost anything, and it works like a charm.” Blondie grinned. “If it works half as good on your husband as it did on you, you got nothin’ to worry about on Saturday.”

  I became alarmed. Blondie had drugged me. My face must have given my thoughts away.

  “Don’t worry. It’s all natural and can’t hurt anyone.”

  “What’s in it?”

  “Mostly Chinese herbs. I blend ginseng, maca, and horny goat weed with some other herbs.”

  “Horny goat weed?”

  “Yeah, got its name when some Chinese farmer noticed his goats acting all horny after grazing on it. Picture that, will you, a bunch of goats mounting each other and humping away.”

  I laughed along with her. “You are too much, Blondie. I have to say, it’s been an amazing shopping experience. I will definitely be in touch with you first thing Monday morning.”

  I never gave her the discount coupon and didn’t notice her stuffing some additional goodies in the bag. When I opened the bag at home, I got one very exciting surprise.

  Chapter Three

  It was tax season, so Mark worked on Saturday, which was perfect for me. I had the whole day to get myself gussied up and ready for our regular Saturday night date—although I hoped what I was doing would create a new and more frequent norm for ou
r sex life.

  I’d scheduled a complete makeover at Goddessa, the salon Blondie recommended. I was going in at ten in the morning for a haircut and color, bikini wax, manicure, pedicure, and make-up application. It was the half-day spa package, and I’d be home by three o’clock with plenty of time to take a quick bath, and ready myself and the bedroom.

  I planned to meet Mark at the door when he came home around six in the sexy new black dress and heels I bought on the way home from Secrets. I’d be holding a glass of wine for him, specially prepared with the ground-up love potion Blondie gave me. After a delicious homecooked dinner and the rest of that bottle of wine, I’d sneak upstairs on the pretext of getting something, change into my new lingerie and see-through nightie, and lure him up to the bedroom with some request.

  I thought it was a good plan, but I forgot to factor in Murphy’s Law. Yes, whatever could go wrong did go wrong.

  My first mistake was to brew some of Blondie’s tea with an extra chamomile tea bag before I left for my salon appointment. I figured one mug would help me to relax and not be so nervous because my inner critic was having a field day telling me that I would be sorry I was going to strange salon and hairdresser. Why was I taking beauty advice from Blondie? I fast-forwarded my thoughts to seeing horror instead of lust on Mark’s face when I appeared in my new lingerie.

  No, I really needed that tea or I probably would have cancelled everything.

  The one cup of tea with my breakfast was so helpful at calming my nerves, I made a second cup and put it in my travel mug. By the time I got to the salon, I was the most relaxed I can ever remember being—and it’s a good thing, too, because the first thing scheduled for my day of beauty was a Brazilian bikini wax. In case you don’t know, during this personal care service, all the pubic hair is removed by laying down strips of warm wax and yanking it off. Yeah, and I was acting like I didn’t have a care in the world.